As a child, I was the 'drama queen'. The eldest, always needing 'attention'.

 

Too much, you know that one?

 

I created a mask of an achiever yet inside I never saw my true worth; spending years climbing the corporate ladder & chasing financial gain yet every time I reached the goal or acquired the ‘things’ I was never fully satisfied.

 

After becoming a mother, my husband felt like a roommate & I resented him for his life not changing, whilst I took on many more balls to juggle & tried to make sense of who I was becoming whilst trying to navigate a career I loved & everything else!!

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I continued to show the perfect façade because everyone called me #supermum & asked ‘how do you do it all’. I wore this as a badge of honour however inside I was anxious AF, with low self esteem & never knew what self love truly meant.

 

I had no confidence or self respect, plagued with #mumguilt because I was supposed to LOVE every minute of this chapter, right?! I had everything I ever wanted, so why was I miserable, anxious & wishing for someone to come & save me?

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In a desperate bid of escapism, I threw myself into my government career hoping it would fix my inner turmoil. ​It helped mask the fears, anxiety & overwhelm for a while, until.. our third child was born.

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​The birth was traumatic. I was broken, physically, mentally, emotionally. I didn’t realise at the time, but that moment was my snap point. It became my opportunity for a completely different life; a homecoming to myself & an opportunity to align with my higher self & purpose.

 

From there I began writing as part of my healing, accessed alternate modalities &  trained as a professional life coach having accessed deeper meaning, healing & awareness for myself.

 

Finally, I had answers to my suffering. I saw everything so clearly, as though a mirror to all the parts of myself that I didn't even know existed but were playing out & determining my everyday experiences.

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I began to feel free. Content. Present. Emotionally stable.

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I had had enough of being a victim, being anxious, blaming others & lapping up drama, so I committed to myself for the very first time & because of this I can proudly say I am the woman I always desired to become - my life is now full of meaning, joy & purpose, thriving relationships with myself & others, confidence, compassion, self-love & respect. Gosh I could go on & on....

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But it didn't happen overnight.

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It took a moment of courage, gaining clarity around what life I truly want to live, who I want to be & releasing the fear of 'If I ask for help that means I'm weak' just enough to be vulnerable & ask for support.

 

And by seeking support, I began to slowly let down the walls I had built up for so long, and the armour accompanying them.

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And finally, the relationships with those around me began flourishing.

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My children now get the best me. My husband gets the best of me, and best of all I get the best of me!!

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My work doesn't feel like work AT ALL. EVER.

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I've owned my inner drama queen, my authenticity & can now use my voice for greater good - inspiring others to do the same, and live authentically aligned with their truth, enjoying more balance, freedom, peace & thriving connections!!

 

There is no ROI greater than putting ourselves as mothers first (in this instance).

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I see you. I was you. You can do hard things & be vulnerable. I'm here to support you. It is totally woerth it.